A Decade of Being A Father.

I now have 3 happy children. All boys. And yesterday marked a decade of me as a father. My first chid was born 10 years ago.

Unlike marriage, turning into a father is a whole new experience and responsibilities. And the first 4 to 5 years, the waking up in the middle of the nights, the cleaning up, the vomits and the trips to clinics, are nothing compared to the next 5 years. The school days are when your teaching and preaching shows in your child.

Every time I see myself in my children, I have fear. I fear they would grow up having my attitude, my fear and my bad habits. I read, when ever I come across any article on children upbringing. Be it from Islamic or Western view. I try to be a good father but I get angry too often too much. I never give up. But at those moments when my boys did something wrong, I would re-act and would think, am I too strict? or am I too lenient? I would try to recall what my father and mother would do when I was growing up. Maybe I think too much. I do not know. But one thing for sure, my doa and prayers for them has changed since. I pray for their steadfastness dan hati yang tidak berbolak balik instead of just being beriman (godly). I pray for their health and them being bersyukur atas nikmat itu (thankfull for their health), I pray for ilmu bermanafaat instead of just being pandai. And I pray that I am a good father to them, which I didn't pray for in the first few years.

Years coming will not be any easier I suppose. Hanya Allah yang lebih mengatahui.

Happy Birthday Fahad !